1. Create your mission statement
This is one that I’m working on right now. One of the homework assignments my coach gave me. To laser beam my intentions, my big life goals into no more than three sentences. To get clear on what it is I am going for, who I want to be and what values I uphold. This is probably the most difficult step on here, but also the most rewarding. Why? Because when we get clear on who we are, what we are going for and values we uphold, it becomes easier to pave the path ahead, say no to things that don’t serve that mission statement and set boundaries more easily. Need an example? Here is Oprah Winfrey’s mission statement “To be a teacher. And to be known for inspiring my students to be more than they thought they could be.” (source: Fast Company)
2. Write down specific goals
So you know what your overall, big dream, goal is via your missions statement. Now let’s break it down. What can you do TODAY to get a step closer to the big dream? Don’t get startled by this one, let’s say you want to start a business. Start by doing some research on the basic things you need to do to begin. Create weekly goals as you start walking in your goal-oriented direction, then monthly goals, maybe goals to hit in 3 months, 6 months or one to five years. Make sure these goals are “Smart goals” (google it) in order to make sure they hold you accountable by being timely, realistic and extremely specific.
3. Become aware of your thoughts and habits
If you have anxiety, you have the mental habit of wanting to control the future or worrying about the past. Notice your natural thought patterns. Are you cranky every Monday on your way to work because you hate running into Shelia at the Monday meeting? Do you become easily irritated while driving? Do you have a panic attack every time you have a project due? Notice your behaviors and start shifting them around. If you find that you always make the kids half-ass lunches when you make them in the morning as opposed when you make them the night before (therefore giving you 10 extra minutes in the morning) - Make. The. Change. Our thoughts become our actions become our habits. Start noticing the parts of yourself you want to improve and do something about it.
4. Become more intentional with who you hang with
I’m finding that making friends as an adult, especially an adult that moved across the country to a brand new state all on her own, is tough. Not just because I can’t meet nice people (which I absolutely have!) but because I’m getting more particular about who I give my time to. Writing that, it feels somewhat harsh, but the truth is, I only have time for people who are going to love and support me (and vice versa) instead of people who attract drama or blame the world for their problems. I am happy to report that I’ve actually had a hard time meeting people like that, as I’m finding most people are trying to be their best selves these days and I’m LOVING it.
5. List what you’re grateful for right now
Often when we are feverishly looking ahead at the future, envisioning the life of our dreams, we get wrapped up in the fact that we aren’t there already. “I’m still having panic attacks” or “It’s going to take forever to make that kind of money….If I ever do” -- Take the time, RIGHT NOW to list things that you’re grateful for. Give it some sincere thought. Don’t just say “I’m thankful for my husband”, say “I’m thankful for my husband because he supports me financially, emotionally and spiritually. He has been so patient in my self-discovery process and I love him so much”. Get detailed about what you’re thankful for! Let it bring you to tears. The universe loves a thankful human.